This is a tribute to the Civil War officer, author and newsman, Ambrose Bierce,
who originally compiled The
America. Noun. Former republic, reportedly founded 1776, but
which foundered soon thereafter. An exemplary idea, a belief better realized
in abstract than actuality.
Anti-Semitism. Noun. Mistrust of Jews by non-Jewish people.
Not to be confused with Semitism, the outright hatred and hostility of Semitic
Jews and Arabs for each other. See Zionism.
Bush. Noun. Prolific shrub, non-native plant beloved by many
for purely decorative purposes. Invasive, fast growing and tends to take over
a garden. Shade tolerant.
Christianity. Noun. 2,000 year-old religion originally based
on gentle non-violence. Now a worldwide cult transformed by conquest, persecution,
money-making and cronyism. See Zionism.
CSI. Acronym (Crime Scene Investigation) Also, refers to the
detectives obsessed with digging up the details but oblivious to the crime.
TV characters, “CSI,” continually absorbed with digging up bones
while the unburied carcass of their country decays under their noses. See NineOneOne.
Democratic Party. Archaic English. Defunct influence group.
Now less powerful than PETA but featuring neutered males and spayed females
Elections. Controlled means of persuading the powerless to
stand in line and prove their gullibility.
Evildoers. Anybody not with the US (and more than half of
all Americans, according to recent polls). All foreigners, foreign-born, foreign-looking
people, or the group Foreigner. All doers and thinkers of evil.
Government. Less than organized crime but on a larger scale.
Uses strong arm methods where possible but prefers the lure of promotions, patriotism,
bribes, medals, judgeships, cabinet positions and high senate offices, to secure
Government Appointment. A high bureaucratic post bestowed
upon someone woefully unqualified by someone equally so. Lately, the higher
the post, the least qualified the person.
Hollywood. Movie factory town. Manufactures blockbusters with
predictable plots, cardboard characters, silly dialogue and explosive special
effects. Prefers films that feature superheroes--mostly cartoon characters--foiling
crimes and criminals that resemble nothing or no one who ever existed.
Homeland Security. Cardboard castle created to install false
sense of security on citizenry with heads in the sand.
Hurricanes. Nature’s acts of terrorism, mostly named
for foreigners. Osama Bin Laden suspected mastermind.
Iraq. Mythical Garden of Eden and site of new Indiana Jones
movie sequel entitled, Temple of Doom and Gloom.
Jihad. A foreign act of violent terrorism, religious inspired,
wholly unrelated to pre-emptive strikes, unlawful occupation or nation-building.
Kean Commission. Belated glimpse into events loosely related
to 9-11attack. Conducted by wealthy appointees overly concerned with arcane
details, questioning key witnesses allowed to avoid pertinent testimony, finally
buried under mountains of paperwork which resulted in a bestselling book.
Lottery. Legalized gambling by state government ostensibly
for the benefit of public education, which magically never materializes. AKA
“Lotto,” a form of addictive, non-prescription medicine. See Money.
Money. Fictitious wealth created by fictitious states and
often called currency. Money is neither liquid nor solid but a vapor, or gas,
pumped into the pockets of the populace to induce them to sleep. A pleasant,
narcotic feeling occurs, “to have money,” and entire populations
are thus controlled by colorful pieces of paper. An addictive substance—See
Lottery—and side effects can be lethal: delusions of grandeur, ambition,
murder, even treason.
MSM. Acronym (Mainstream Media). Happy lapdogs. Overfed pets
who guard the nation. They sniff at felons, whimper at scoundrels, and wag their
tails while the whole household is emptied. Satisfied at last, they lick their
balls, confident the doorknobs are secure.
Nation-building. Conquest and occupation of one nation by
another, for its own good.
NeoCons. Future convicts in a perfect world, role model in
NineOneOne. (9-11) Formidable attack on US urban areas, never
fully investigated (See CSI). Crime scenes hastily wrapped in flags, ribbons
and black bunting and then hurriedly swept away when mainstream media (MSM)
not looking. Forensics painstakingly examined the DNA at Fresh Kills but never
examined the motives, means and opportunity of masterminds who benefited (See
Osama Bin Laden. AKA Usama or OBL. Mastermind terrorist and
World’s-most-wanted-criminal. Tall, bearded, ascetic Muslim who once lived
in a cave. Evidently possesses superpower, since able to thwart FBI, CIA, NORAD
and Pentagon. Reportedly invisible.
Pre-emptive Strike. Noun and verb. Democracy-building through
creative bombardment. Military incursion to stop proliferation of weapons through
use of superior weapons. See War.
Rap. Rhyming ghetto jargon intended to shock the mainstream,
mostly white, society. Set to loud, monotonous music difficult to dance to.
Meant to establish a voice for poor or powerless minorities but wholly adopted
by poor and powerless white kids, who play it loudly after conquering poor and
Shock & Awe. Creative military jargon for quick air strikes
using fancy expensive weapons instead of boring diplomacy. Also expected reaction—“shock
& awe”--of next generation of Americans when bill for weaponry falls
Talk Radio. Blather for white people stuck in traffic who
cannot rhyme or rap. Propaganda outlet for huddled masses who imagine they enjoy
political power with the state but assuredly do not.
Televangelist. Animated actor in tailored suit with a gift
of gab and a TV time slot. Capable of generating millions, allegedly for the
Glory of God. Claims to knows Jesus personally; claims spiritual rebirth; claims
to speak for God and vice versa (mostly the former). Allegedly Protestant (dating
from the protests of Martin Luther), televangelists protest little nowadays.
Should God and the state ever clash, actor always chooses the state—without
protest. See Christianity.
Television. Contrived, artless programming for morons, by
morons and about morons. Created to sell consumer products to over-indulged
morons, not least of all the sale of acceptable ideas, societal behavior and
War. Profitable enterprise thought up by think tanks, lobbyists,
talk radio hosts, bored heads of state and religious nuts (Or anyone not directly
involved in the fighting), for use of tax money extorted from otherwise peaceful
citizens. War is the disease of the state disguised as a healthy, lawful enterprise.
WASP. The insects at the top of the food chain. Omnivorous,
they can eat anything and often do. What they do not eat, they own. Except Zions
Zionism. New age mystic cult, mostly Jewish but also Wasp.
Core beliefs are money-making, cronyism, conquest, control of MSM and Madonna,
and of course, debased spirituality. Motto is, “By way of deception thou
shalt make war.” See (modern) Christianity.